As always, December is a month to reflect on the year we’re leaving behind and make plans for the year to come. Have you decided on your focus topics for next year yet? Are you planning to focus on your health, career, family, relationships? With a few weeks left, we want to share some possible goals for 2025 and today – we’re tackling the topic of self-care. Here are 5 great self-care resolutions for next year!
- Balancing your time off
- Allowing yourself to feel hard feelings
- Being mindful with your time and energy
- Setting clear boundaries
- Allowing others to help
Balancing your time off
What’s your favorite thing to do when you aren’t sleeping, working, doing chores, or taking care of someone else? It could be anything – whether it’s something artistic, something physical, playing a board game, watching Netflix, gardening, or thrift shopping. Whatever it is, consider balancing your time off between different types of activities. That way, you’ll nurture all parts of your body & soul and won’t starve some at the expense of others. Here’s the four types of activities we’d like to suggest:
- Consume something. Whether it’s going to a museum, watching your favorite show, or listening to a podcast – and yes, even scrolling through your Instagram timeline – consuming things created by others helps us get inspired and doesn’t cost any energy. It’s something you can do with very little effort. Consuming new things also boosts your dopamine, the reward hormone that contributes to us feeling energized to do stuff. That’s also the trap here – if you are only consuming, you’ll find that the quick-fix it provides will be in the way when you want to do something else. So – balance!
- Create something new. Creating things you enjoy – whether you’re writing a blog, making sculptures, or coming up with new recipes – sparks your creative energy. It’s probably the one single activity that contributes most to a sense of purpose. It’s also a great outlet for your ideas and emotions.
- Reach out to others. Connection with those we care about – whether they’ve been in your life for years or are people you just met – is actually really good for your health. Social support helps activate your parasympathetic nervous system, the part of your nervous system that’s responsible for relaxing. It’s also great for your serotonin and oxytocin levels, hormones make you feel happy and love(d).
- Move your body (and take care of it in other ways). Odder beings like us tend to get stuck in our minds a lot. And although our minds are wondrous places, you may know the rush of truly feeling inside your body. So… plan activities that will help you get there. Exercise (in whatever way your body permits you – whether it’s seated Qi Gong or running a marathon and take time to pay attention to your senses.
You don’t have to balance all of these activities on the same day, or even in the same week. If you’re driven by hyperfocus (and many of us are) – it’s totally possible you’ll spend one week catching up on your favorite show, the other creating something new, yet another – doing something else. But if you notice one of these aspects doesn’t get enough attention – ask yourself how you could incorporate it into your daily life!
Being mindful with your time and energy
Here’s something we often learn the hard way: just because something sounds fun, doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to do it. That’s not even including things that aren’t fun – just meh (or even things we don’t really feel like doing).
With any given activity that isn’t an absolute necessity, try asking yourself 2 questions.
- Does this activity contribute to my vision? (If you’re not clear on your vision yet, check out our articles on making a vision board – December is an amazing month to do it, but you can do it throughout the year, too)
- Will this activity contribute to my overall (physical, mental, social) wellbeing? This is not to say that you shouldn’t ever do something for anyone else, but be mindful about the things you’re giving. It’ll help you make sure that you’re giving from a place of abundance and that you won’t be left pouring from an empty cup.
Being mindful with your time and energy might mean you have to say ‘no’ to that party (despite the raging FOMO) because what you really want is to take a bath, watch Breaking Bad, or finish the painting you’re working on.
Saying ‘no’ also means we make space for the things that do fit our vision and nurture us. When we pack our lives to the brim, we’re not leaving a lot of space for new good things to come up. So consider building in some empty space, too.
Looking back at last year, do you feel that you only (or mostly) say ‘yes’ to things that are good for you – both in the short and the long term? Or is this a topic that needs you attention in 2025?
Allowing yourself to feel hard feelings
Running away from hard feelings is probably the biggest mental health issue going on in this moment. So much is going on in the world – both on a global scale and often on a personal one – that may feel scary, painful, or sad. Subconsciously, we’re often afraid these feelings might literally kill us (thanks, left-overs from prehistoric humans). So what do we do? We run. Sometimes literally, but more often we try to numb ourselves. With alcohol or drugs, or with quick highs such as social media, Netflix, or Candy Crush. (There’s nothing wrong with any of these things, but when you use them to stop feeling… well, you stop feeling.)
Here’s the one big secret: feelings might hurt, but generally – the more we’re willing to sit with them, the less they kill us.
So if you’re feeling any discomfort – whether it’s frustration, rage, fear, anxiety, grief, jealousy, or anything else – see what happens if you don’t run. Allow yourself to feel it. Pay close attention to your body. Notice where the feeling shows up. Is it like chills going through your body? Is your stomach in knots? Is your face getting all hot? Pay attention, then pay attention some more. Eventually, you’ll notice your body knows you’ve noticed the warning signs it’s sending you and the feeling will slowly become less consuming, possibly even fade away. Bonus: You won’t accidentally shut out all the happy feelings.
Setting Boundaries
Okay we know – we’ve touched on this one before. Setting (and enforcing!) boundaries is essentially saying: “My peace matters to me, and I’m willing to make some uncomfortable choices to keep it.” Boundaries may look like walking away from a relationship, a job, a friendship… They may also simply be you choosing situations that work for you.
We’ve got multiple tools to help you set boundaries. Until the end of 2024, you still get a discount when you enroll in our course Boundary Breakthrough. Not ready to go all in yet? Try our Boundary Launchpad tool or even our free assessment.
Allowing others to help
Last but not least, self-care doesn’t actually mean you have to do it yourself. Sometimes, all you need to do yourself is allowing others to help you. The more you surround yourself with people who are comfortable with their own boundaries, the more you can tell them what you need without having to fear they’ll overstretch themselves. This help can take my different shapes. Here’s a couple of examples:
- Is it okay if I vent about the fight I had?
- Could you advice me about [challenge]?
- I really need a distraction from this thing I’m stressed about. Want to go do something fun together?
- I’m struggling with [task], could you help me?
- Something happened and I kind of need to be around someone now. Could you come over?
- Can I borrow your [whatever tool you need that will help you do a chore quicker and better]?
We often feel like asking for help makes us weak (it doesn’t – being able to accept help is a great social and mental strength) and like we’re imposing on someone else. But guess what – oftentimes, others are only too happy to help us.
Tip: Ask the right people. Ideally, whatever help you require won’t cost the other person too much. The trick is to keep in mind that things that cost you a lot may not feel the same to others. Maybe your friend doesn’t mind helping you with cleaning, even though it’s something that steals all of your joy. In turn, maybe they desperately need parenting advice, something you could help them with (and this doesn’t have to be at the same moment).
If this is something you struggle with, consider it as one of your self-care resolutions for next year!
Self-care Resolutions to goals
A good place to start with your goals is actually by looking back on last year. We’ve got a template you can download for free here, check it out!
Once you’ve reflected on the year behind you and identified the main resolutions you want to work on, don’t forget to turn them into habits or goals. This means making them specific so you can objectively answer with a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ on whether you’ve managed to reach them. Here’s what this might look like:
Habit: “Every week, I want to spend at least one hour on creating something new and half a day on connecting with someone else.”
Goal: “I want to identify 5 things that I could use help with and reach out to others to help me.”
Habit: “I want to spend 10 minutes every evening to mindfully feel any hard emotions that came up during the day.”
Goal: “I want to tell my boss ‘no’ next time he asks me to work more hours than I’m supposed to.”
Habit: “I want to take 5 minutes of time-out before saying ‘yes’ to any requests to decide whether I actually want to do it.” Your turn! What are your self-care resolutions for upcoming year?
